Metaphorically speaking

09 Jun, 2026

Although the title is metaphors the following also encompasses similes, idioms, and analogies. I swear I know the difference.

I'd rather read something precise and witty over something beautiful. That's my personal preference. I like a clippy style. Clearness over decoration. Austen's intellectualism, Stein's repetition, Verne's literalism. Except of course beautiful decorative things still knock my socks off sometimes. What I think we can all agree on is bad metaphors are bad.

At the same time... I do get hyped when I see

her eyes were pools of cerulean blue

because I know we are in for a fun time. And some metaphors are gloriously and deliberately incorrect, which is not bad at all. Terry Pratchett, for instance, and this from Douglas Adams:

The ships hung in the sky in much the same way that bricks don't.

I remember these funny analogies not from high school students going around and I remain obsessed with

The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a bowling ball wouldn't.

A mixed metaphor can be fun, I am fond of 'we'll burn that bridge when we get to it.' Which is, properly, a malaphor.

The domain metaphors deal in is often much of the problem. Too much sports. I will not understand the sports metaphor. In some sports the metaphor is all I know: in baseball you are supposed to knock it out the park. So many British idioms are from the Navy or otherwise nautical - a whole essay and probably even book unto itself.

Also, if the book is in first person or close third... Is this an abstraction the character would use? Does it seem in character? Not only the knowledge required but also the urge to metaphor in the first place.

Personally I feel metaphors aren't really necessary when it's something we all know. That they should be saved for enhancing understanding. But other people think they should be used particularly for things we all know, to make them fresh.

This brings me back to how 'show don't tell' has a lot to answer for. Generally, and definitely in encouraging metaphorising.

I'm bad at metaphors. I'd rather just say the thing. So, usually, I just say the thing.